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Opening Arguments

Dinner and

Police run into some classy people:

An Evansville man being arrested on accusations of public intoxication and disorderly conduct received a new charge when he allegedly offered to buy the arresting officers dinner if they would let him go.

Police say Angelo J. Cooper, 32, later changed the offer to $10 and a toaster before threatening to harm the officers a short time after they declined. Cooper is being held today in the Vanderburgh County Jail on charges including bribing a public servant, a Class C felony, and intimidation, a Class D felony.

Bribes aren't what they used to be, are they? Tough economy.

None of the offers were accepted, the police dutifully noted and the newspaper obligingly reported. Reminds me of a joke that I can't really tell here. It involves a woman and her husband and a retiring mailman, and the punchline has the woman saying to the mailman, "But breakfast was my idea." The toaster and the $10 were just the booze talking, but I bet dinner was his idea.