I have had so much coffee in my life that could have fit this description:
MUNCIE, Ind. - A Muncie eighth-grader has been suspended from school and faces expulsion after admitting that he put urine in a teacher's coffee pot.
The Wilson Middle School teacher noticed that the coffee had an unusual odor Friday and reported it to the principal.
I don't mean just the smell; I mean the taste, too. One of the things I like about McDonald's is that they make a pretty good cup of coffee (if a little weak), and they throw it out and start over in a reasonable time frame. I can't tell you how many high-end restaurants I've been to in which a good meal was ruined by a cup of coffee at the end tasting like it had been on the burner for two days, with some urine thrown in for good measure. (There is a great difference between "good and strong" and "burnt and bitter," which I hope Starbucks learns one of these days.)
I do like my coffee strong -- I even admit to being an addict, having to make it stronger and stronger to get the same effect. My family members won't even drink my coffee without diluting it, filling the cup only two-thirds full and topping it off with hot water.
Whatever happened, by the way, to putting a thumbtack on teacher's chair or gluing an apple to her desktop? Oh, that's right; I'm getting old. More coffee here!