Foul ball

But don't call it a bailout, OK?

The NBA has reportedly borrowed $200 million to distribute to interested teams due to the struggling economy.

[. . .]

The reports said at least 12 teams have requested funds, with as many as 15 wanting money that could potentially help cover losses.

In tough economic times, doesn't our obsession with organized sports seem a little silly? Or maybe you think this is the time when we need harmless diversions more than ever. Why isn't anybody proposing the players take a pay cut by the way? They get, I think, about 57 percent of the NBA's revenue, so a 10 percent cut ought to just about cover the $200 million. Or maybe basketball could consider downsizing, the way everyone else has. Let's see, we make a team four players instead of five, so that means fewer backup players would be needed as well. We could get rid of one assistant coach per team. We could do with one less official on the court.

Then, when fans rebel and stop going to the games, increase the ticket cost by, oh, 1,000 percent. And sneak an NBA-stimulus tax into our phone bills where we won't notice it.

See, I can, too, learn from the federal government.