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News-Sentinel.com Your Town. Your Voice.
Opening Arguments

Hog heaven

By God, this is just too much. I've been fighting against pork all my adult life, and now people in my own state -- those wastrel, profligate, no-good sons of spenders -- are actually going to celebrate it?

Oh, wait:

Hog farmers say things are looking up for the industry as they prepare for the "Year of the Pig" at the Indiana State Fair, which starts on Friday.


The H1N1 scare took a bite out of the pork industry, though there was never a link between eating pork and getting the illness, 6News' Renee Jameson reported.


The pork industry brings home the bacon for a lot of farmers in Indiana, about $3 billion to the state economy annually.

Never mind.

Suppose any candidates for Congress will show up, or will the theme cause them shame and embarrassment? Don't really know how they could pass up something like this:

Along with food, a host of hog-centric events, including hog calling contests, pig racing and a kissing contest are scheduled this year.

How is a kissing contest "hog-centric"? Will be actually be, you know, kissing hogs? Or just kissing like pigs, however that is? And, look, don't put a hyphen in your "reaching for made up words" humor there, son, it looks amateurish. Maybe you should stick with the old standbys like "took a bite out of the pork industry" and "bringing home the bacon" for farmers. The're not funny, either, but at least they're comfortably familiar.


Tue, 08/03/2010 - 1:51pm

I don't know about the year of the pig. But we had the presidency of the pork from 2000-2008. Dubya vetoed, what, two things? None of it pork. No wonder that Clinton surplus blossomed under Bush.