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News-Sentinel.com Your Town. Your Voice.
Opening Arguments


Aw, shucks, don't mention it. Glad to be of service:

MUNCIE -- Carol Schafer has been looking for work since she and 10 other employees at Radiology Associates and Bethel Billing were laid off Nov. 8, 2008.

Now Schafer is considering expanding her job search to include nursing homes, an industry she thinks might provide more stability than others.

"It's going to be a growing field," she said Thursday. "Everyone is living older. Now you have people who are living into their 80s, 90s and 100s."

The recession that has affected Schafer and 287,000 other unemployed Hoosiers comes at a time when the country's largest generation, the Baby Boomers, are entering seniority. So while Americans are growing hungrier for jobs, nursing homes are becoming hungrier for labor.

But I want only pretty nurses, OK? And they shouldn't talk too much, unless I ask a question, then they should answer at length and then go get my orange juice. I want three pillows -- not two, not four -- and the room should be precisely 72 degrees, unless I feel a chill, then somebody better come to turn up the thermostat the minute I buzz. You can keep all the games -- board and electronic both -- in the storeroom, but I want lots of cable channels and a van to take me to the Rib Room every Friday night.

Hey, I've been practicing to be a mean old man all my life. Let me enjoy the fantasy.


Bob G.
Fri, 10/30/2009 - 10:32am

You forgot to mention the mind-numbing medication (for all those cable channels) and that HOVER-ROUND that goes from 0-10 in TEN SECONDS...lol!
Curmudgeons of the world...unite!

Fri, 10/30/2009 - 6:16pm

Repeat after me: Hey you kids! Get off my lawn!