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Opening Arguments

Feeling safe yet?

Not likely to increase the number of female NFL fans:

I’m a woman. I’m an NFL fan.

And now I’m annoyed.

The NFL today announced a new policy that forbids anyone from carrying a purse that’s larger than a paperback novel into football games starting in the preseason. But – and here is the ridiculous kicker and I quote -- you can use a “one-gallon clear plastic freezer bag (Ziploc bag or similar).”

I have just one question: What man thought this up?

Because, seriously?! A clear plastic freezer bag?

What woman in her right mind – even in her drunken mind after a few hours of tailgating – is going to load up her smartphone, lipstick, money, credit cards, keys, not to mention tampons, in a clear plastic bag for all the world to see? Not many, I predict.

The NFL isn't just picking on women, of course. Also banned are
Coolers, briefcases, backpacks, fanny packs, cinch bags, seat cushions, luggage, computer bags and camera bags-- anything you might hide a bomb in. It's just one more way to annoy us without really adding anything to our safety. Wonder how long before they make us strip down to shorts and T-shirts without pockets?

Posted in: Sports