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Opening Arguments

Fried

For the "here we go again" file:

The U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) is proposing strict new dietary guidelines for day cares that would prohibit them from frying food that is served to children.

Child care providers would also be formally required to provide children with water upon request, though they would face restrictions on how much apple juice and orange juice they serve.

One of the more notable provisions would restrict day cares from frying food on site and discourage them from serving pre-packaged fried food, such as chicken fingers, from the grocery store.

“While facilities would not be permitted under this proposed rule to prepare foods on site by frying them,” the USDA wrote in the Federal Register, “store-bought, catered, or pre-fried foods can still contribute large amounts of calories and saturated fat to a meal. Therefore, facilities are encouraged to limit all fried and pre-fried foods to no more than once per week.”

But now that I think about it, these kids are going to end up in public schools at which the government mandates "healthy" food that they won't eat, so I suppose they should get used to gastronomic fascism before they get there. I know some moms are going to try to cheat by giving the kids a fried-egg-and-bacon breakfast before packing them off to day care, but I'll bet the government can come up with a test for that. Drop that spatula, lady!

And don't ever think they can't get even more insane:

The USDA's meal standards also include other proposed changes, such as allowing tofu as a meat alternative.

A tofu burger washed down with water. Yum!

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