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Opening Arguments

Trash

Let's talk trash.

Mike Huckabee is aghast at foul-mouthed women:

Former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee said in a recent radio appearance that while in New York for his Fox News show, he experienced significant culture shock from all the “trashy” women swearing in a professional setting.

“In the South, or in the Midwest, there in Iowa, you would not have people who would just throw the F-bomb or use gratuitous profanity in a professional setting,” Huckabee told host Jan Mickelson in a Friday appearance on Des Moines’ “Mickelson in the Morning.”

 

“In New York, not only do the men do it, but the women,” he said.

“My gosh, this is worse than locker-room talk,” Huckabee continued. “As we would say in the South, that’s just trashy.”

Gosh, Mike. I think you're a little too pure to be in politics. They can overdo it of course, but I actually like a little cussin' from my wiminfolk. Kinda sexy, you know? I'd even go so far as to agree with Jerry Jeff Walker -- "I like my women a little on the trashy side."

In Seattle, you will earn a Scarlet Letter of shame for not properly sorting your trash:

The bright red tag, posted on a garbage bin, tells everyone who sees it that you’ve violated a new city law that makes it illegal to put food into trash cans.

“I’m sure neighbors are going to see these on their other neighbors’ cans,” says Rodney Watkins, a lead driver for Recology CleanScapes, a waste contractor for the city. He’s on the front lines of enforcing these rules.

Seattle is the first city in the nation to fine homeowners for not properly sorting their garbage. The law took effect on Jan. 1 as a bid to keep food out of landfills. Other cities like San Francisco and Vancouver mandate composting, but don’t penalize homeowners directly.

As Watkins made the rounds in Maple Leaf, a residential neighborhood of Seattle, earlier this month, he appeared disheartened to find an entire red velvet cake in someone’s trash bin. Any household with more than 10 percent food in its garbage earns a bright red tag notifying it of the infraction.

I wonder who's going to get the job of going through all the trash to test for the 10 percent limit? How do you tell the differnce between 9 percent and 10 percent? Why do we put up with crap like this?

Finally, a story that melds trash and trashy behavior:

MUNCIE — What kind of person drops a puppy in a trash bin, closes the lid and walks away?

That's what local police and animal rescue officials were asking on Saturday after rescuing a puppy from a trash receptacle on Muncie's south side.

"I just don't understand what goes through someone's mind when they think that's an acceptable way to get rid of animals," Muncie Animal Shelter director Phil Peckinpaugh told The Star Press.

I ever meet up with that puppy tosser, I'll get my lady to cuss him out good.

Comments

Joe
Wed, 01/28/2015 - 1:58pm

So let me get this right. The same Mike Huckabee who is so offended by women saying the f-word around his virgin ears and has judged these people to be "trashy" doesn't find Ted Nugent, the draft dodging pedophile "trashy" ?

The same Ted Nugent that a year ago was guest of House Republican Steven Stockman at the State of the Union address. Rep. Stockman was "excited to have a patriot like Ted Nugent" joining him.  Teddy is the same "patriot" that said quote: "I got my physical notice 30 days prior to. Well, on that day I ceased cleansing my body. No more brushing my teeth, no more washing my hair, no baths, no soap, no water. Thirty days of debris build. I stopped shavin' and I was 18, had a little scraggly beard, really looked like a hippie. I had long hair, and it started gettin' kinky, matted up. Then two weeks before, I stopped eating any food with nutritional value. I just had chips, Pepsi, beer-stuff I never touched-buttered poop, little jars of Polish sausages, and I'd drink the syrup, I was this side of death, Then a week before, I stopped going to the bathroom. I did it in my pants. poop, piss the whole shot. My pants got crusted up. 

See, I approached the whole thing like, Ted Nugent, cool hard-workin' dude, is gonna wreak havoc on these imbeciles in the armed forces. I'm gonna play their own game, and I'm gonna destroy 'em. Now my whole body is crusted in poop and piss. I was ill. And three or four days before, I started stayin' awake. I was close to death, but I was in control. I was extremely antidrug as I've always been, but I snorted some crystal methedrine. Talk about one wounded motherf*cker. A guy put up four lines, and it was for all four of us, but I didn't know and I'm vacuuming that poop right up. I was a walking, talking hunk of human poop. I was six-foot-three of sin. So the guys took me down to the physical, and my nerves, my emotions were distraught. I was not a good person. I was wounded. But as painful and nauseous as it was — 'cause I was really into bein' clean and on the ball — I made gutter swine hippies look like football players. I was deviano. 

So I went in, and those guys in uniform couldn't believe the smell. They were ridiculin' me and pushin' me around and I was cryin', but all the time I was laughin' to myself. When they stuck the needle in my arm for the blood test I passed out, and when I came to they were kicking me into the wall. Then they made everybody take off their pants, and I did, and this sergeant says, "Oh my God, put those back on! You f*cking swine you!" Then they had a urine test and I couldn't piss, But my poop was just like ooze, man, so I poop in the cup and put it on the counter. I had poop on my hand and my arm. The guy almost puked. I was so proud. I knew I had these chumps beat. The last thing I remember was wakin' up in the ear test booth and they were sweepin' up. So I went home and cleaned up. 

They took a putty knife to me. I got the street rats out of my hair, ate some good steaks, beans, potatoes, cottage cheese, milk. A couple of days and I was ready to kick ass. And in the mail I got this big juicy 4-F. They'd call dead people before they’d call my ass. But you know the funny thing about it? I'd make an incredible army man. I'd be a colonel before you knew what hit you, and I'd have the baddest bunch of motherf*ckin' killers you'd ever seen in my platoon. But I just wasn't into it. I was too busy doin' my own thing, you know? "

This deviant, who sits an the board of the NRA, loves to shoot at things that can't shoot back but when he had the chance to act as bad as he talks, not so much.


Evidentally. Mr. Huckabee doesn't find an individual who is an admitted pedophile and spends a month urinating and defecating in his pants "trashy" but a woman swearing offends him?  Could it just be that the GOP cozys up with Teddy because of his NRA connections?

 

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