Just when I think I'm in danger of becoming a total cynic, along comes a story that renews my faith in America and the simple virtues that made us great. Who among you hasn't yearned for the days when wide-eyed beauties would step before the microphone, adjust their crowns and assure us earnestly that they believed in world peace and ending hunger? Forget those empty-headed sluts in Playboy who said they valued sincerity and long walks on the beach? These were real American girls. Those days aren't gone completely, friends. Consider the case of Marisa Yochum, a senior at DePauw University, who has just been named Honey Princess by the Indiana State Beekeepers Association. Is that honor going to her head? Certainly not:
"I wrote about how using honey over sugar as a sweetener can make an impact on global warming," Yochum tells the Plymouth Pilot News in a story detailing her award. The newspaper's Joseph Raymond writes that Yochum described how "processing sugar takes several steps using chemicals and contributes to global warming by producing greenhouse gases. Using honey in place of sugar can help reduce these emissions, according to Marisa," he reports.
Of course we're also exploiting bees for our own selfish ends, but nothing's perfect.