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News-Sentinel.com Your Town. Your Voice.
Opening Arguments

Awww, isums stresse

The lame leading the pathetic:

According to the National Association of Health Education Centers, children's stress levels have increased 45 percent over the past 30 years.

Youngsters are most frequently worried about parents, peers and grades, the organization said.

Sherri Mincher, a licensed massage therapist in Westminster, wants to help. Thinking about her son and the anxiety he suffers, she started Stress Busters Camp.

The camp lasts for five weeks, and teaches children breathing, stretching and relaxation techniques.

Mincher also encourages children to share their stressful experiences with the group, so that they all can work on developing coping skills.

[. . .]

The camp offers one 45-minute session weekly. The cost ranges from $90 to $113 for five weeks.

Mincher said she intends to limit each session to five children between the ages of 5 and 13.

"What I've found is a lot of these kids have social issues," she said.

Lord knows we can't have a bunch of 5-to-13-year-olds running around with "social issues," so something must be done. Personally, I'd recommend a summer job delivering papers or mowing laws, but a "licensed marriage therapist" probably knows a lot more about modern stress than I do. I'd be willing to bet that a very high percentage of these delicate angels, every ounce of stress delicately brushed away from their precious shoulders, will end up being serial killers.


Bob G.
Thu, 07/02/2009 - 2:28pm

Now, there 'ya go again, Leo...
being overly OPTIMISTIC.