This would be too easy, so I'll just let you do your own jokes:
Bill Clinton made a plea yesterday for a new emphasis on monogamy as a key element in the battle against Aids.
The former US president, not noted for his ability to keep his own marriage vows, said it was very important to change people's attitudes to sex.
In an interview with the BBC recorded in Africa, Mr Clinton said that increasing support for monogamy was not just a problem for the continent worst hit by Aids but for the world.
Next, I want to be lectured by Barack Obama on the need for humility, Hillary Clinton on cooperation, John McCain on constancy, Rush Limbaugh on compassion for drug addicts, Bret Favre on retirement . . .