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Opening Arguments

Good old summertime

They do know how to have fun in Ohio:

Newark police say that Konink saw a neighbor riding a motorized bar stool shortly before the man wrecked while trying to make a U-turn.

Police say that Kile Wygle, 28, had one too many before wheeling his homemade oddity around the neighborhood on March 4.

Wygle was charged with driving the bar stool while under the influence of alcohol and driving while under suspension. He has pleaded not guilty to the charges and asked for a jury trial. No court date has been set.

According to a report by Officer Michael Trotter, Wygle told him that his bar stool can reach a speed of 38 mph but that he was traveling only about 20 mph when he wrecked.

At Licking Memorial Hospital, where Wygle was treated for minor injuries, he chuckled about his bar stool. Wygle told Trotter that he'd had about 15 beers before the wreck. The man refused to take a blood-alcohol test.

He was obviously just practicing for an upcoming barstool-race, which is apparently big in some parts of the country. You can even find barstool-racing kits online. Say, you know what? If we put barstool racing together with Cornhold and Ladder Ball (per Sue's suggestion in the comments)

Comments

Bob G.
Tue, 03/31/2009 - 8:29am

LMAO, Leo...
(took the words right out of my mouth)
Lemme hold your beer...

;)

Michael B-P
Tue, 03/31/2009 - 9:17am

Who needs high speed rail when we can have 38mph bar stools? Just turn one pair of toll road lanes into a "DUI-free" zone for a month or two each summer and charge a $2 toll every mile and offer free refills.

Bob G.
Tue, 03/31/2009 - 9:42am

ROFL...nice idea, Michael!
(especially the free "refills")

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