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Opening Arguments

Madonna Dearest

I have to wait until my Newsweek comes to get any real news. This item was tucked in the back of the latest issue, under Newsmakers:

Just because her name is Madonna, does she have to take being a mother so seriously? It's one thing to keep Lourdes, 9, and Rocco, 5 from watching TV -- they might catch Mom kissing Britney Spears. But what does she have against magazines? Or milk and ice cream, which are also banned. "When Daddy gets home, they get chocolate," Madonna says. "I'm the disciplinarian." And heaven help Lourdes if she leaves her laundry on the floor. "We take all of her clothes and put them in a bag, and she has to earn all her clothes back by being tidy," Madonna says. "She wears the same outfit every day to school until she learns her lesson." That's one way to make sure your daughter doesn't turn into a material girl.

You know how former smokers are the biggest anti-smoking Nazis? I'd say this applies here, about a lot of things. Another Mommie Dearest in the making.

This is the same issue, by the way, that has the cover story about "How Women Lead," accompanied by a picture of Oprah (or "O," as I like to call her), not to be confused with the photo on the same page as the Madonna item showing the three blondes posing with the boyfriend older than all of them put together, Hugh Hefner.

All the bases covered, as usual.

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