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News-Sentinel.com Your Town. Your Voice.
Opening Arguments

On the road to equality

In today's America, this is sad but not really surprising:

A 9-year-old who has won five straight reading contests at a New York library now has a new challenger to his throne – the library’s director, who says the young reader “hogs” the contest prizes each year and should “step aside.”

Tyler Weaver, who starts fifth grade in September, won the “Dig Into Reading” contest at the Hudson Falls Public Library this summer by reading 63 books from June 24 to Aug. 3, the Post-Star reports.

[. . .]

“Other kids quit because they can’t keep up,” Marie Gandron said, adding that she considered changing the rules of the contest so prizes are given to children whose names are pulled out of a hat instead of reading the most books.

Yeah, the selfish little bastard. How dare he enjoy reading so much? As a matter of fact, he shouldn't just step aside. He should deliberately lose once or twice -- that would be appropriately humiliating. Even better, rig the contest so somebody else wins no matter how well Tyler does. That''' show him he can't keep beating everybody.

Today's recommended reading -- Kurt Vonnegut's dystopian short story "Harrison Bergeron." Ms. Grandon would make a great Handicapper General.