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Opening Arguments

Such sweet sorrow

Hey, it's Stupid Celebrities Amusing Us Monday:

CHRIS Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow held a bizarre separating ceremony to prepare themselves for their imminent divorce.

The estranged A-list pair took part in the oddball spiritual healing ceremony while holidaying in the Bahamas last week.

A friend close to Gwyneth and Chris, who have two children together, claimed they took part in a beach ritual performed by a Kabbalah Rabbi on what they called their “break-up moon”.

As part of the service the celebrity pair read from the sacred Kabbalah book Zohar, lit a fire, used stones to symbolise their continuing concrete relationship and threw pebbles into the sea to represent their “wandering spirits”.

They then read out: “Blessed are you in coming in and blessed are you in going out,” before sharing a parting kiss.

Awww. Blessed coming in and blessed going out. Can't tell you how many dark days that has gotten me through. I wonder if Gwyneth had a separation shower. I guess my invitation to the separation soon-to-be-a-bachelo0r party got lost in the mail.

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