joke

Today's joke:

A woman was walking on the beach when she came upon a lamp. She picked it up and rubbed it, and, of course, a genie popped out. "I will give you one wish," the genie said. "That's easy," the woman replied. "I want peace in the Mideast. Look at the countries I've got marked on this map, and make them stop fighting each other."

Today's joke:

Barack Obama walks into a bar with a duck on his head.

Bartender looks up and says, "Say, where'd you get the Chicago-influenced secret Muslim with the angry, unpatriotic wife?"

"You ignorant, ill-informed, right-wing alcohol pusher," Obama replies. "This is Not a Chicago-influenced secret Muslim with an angry, unpatriotic wife. This is a duck."

"I was TALKING to the duck."