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A Hoosier tragedy

Is anybody else getting tired of the "Omigod, will be ready for digital TV?" hysteria? They've had those stupid crawls about it going across our screens for what seems like a year now. And last night, they did the unforgivable: pre-empted my "Jeopardy!" to do a half-hour special for all the morons who haven't gotten the message yet. By all means, Indianapolis Star, you jump in, too:

More than 30 percent of Central Indiana households that use antennas to watch broadcast stations still are unprepared for next year's transition to digital TV, according to a government report released Wednesday.

The metro area -- which includes about 1 million households in 33 counties for the purposes of the National Telecommunications and Information Administration's report -- trails many others in the state when it comes to consumers ordering $40 coupons for digital converter boxes.

Dear, dear, oh, dear, Central Indiana lags behind in orders for converter boxes. What a darned tragedy. Oh, well. Let me help: Your rabbit ears won't CUT IT, OK? Get a box! Oh, wait. If you still use rabbit ears, you probably aren't online, are you? Never mind, then.

For those of you who might have forgotten, this mass conversion to digital wasn't the bright idea of TV moguls. It was mandated by the same Congress that is bringing us compulsory CFL light bulbs and blessed us with toilets that don't quite flush right. Can't wait till they start running the car companies.

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