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A true emergency

I guess I've lived a more sheltered life than I had supposed, because here's a problem I really didn't realize we needed a state law to fix:

BLOOMINGTON, Ind. - A state lawmaker says he plans to sponsor a bill next session that would bar adult males from applying spray-on tans to female juveniles at tanning salons.

State Rep. Bruce Borders, R-Jasonville, said he was shocked by a recent case where an adult man who works at a tanning salon applied a spray-on tan on a nude 15-year-old girl.

Borders said he can't believe there's not a law prohibiting that type of activity.

"I think it's important not only for the customers but for the business that no one be put in any kind of compromising position," he said.

You have to feel sorry for all those bewildered adult men out there just praying for a state law that will keep them from any kind of compromising position with nude 15-year-old girls. Why wait till next session? We're going to have a special session this year with nothing on the agenda but the silly old state budget. Will the law also apply to adult females and nude 15-year-old boys, or are they on their own in the moral wilderness? Or don't 15-year-old boys get spray-on tans?

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