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Opening Arguments

Suit up, players

If Maslow were around to work on his hierarchy of needs today, he might need to make an addition to the five layers of his pyramid. The existing levels would remain the same (from bottom to top): psysiological needs, such as food and water and sex, are met first; then safety needs, followed by love/belonging needs; after those are met, we can work on our esteem needs; finally we can work on our self-actualization needs, such as morality and creativity.

But now we need a new layer at the very top, to show that we are capable of reaching our full human potential: Eliminating discrimination in the scheduling of girls basketball games.

A federal appeals court will hear arguments on whether 14 eastern Indiana schools — including Richmond Community Schools — discriminated against girls by scheduling their basketball games for weeknights and not weekends.

The 7th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Chicago will hear arguments in the case today.


The suit alleges the schools discriminate against girls by scheduling girls games for weeknights and Saturday afternoons while boys games are on Friday and Saturday nights.


The suit says that diminishes the importance of girls sports and makes it harder for girls to finish homework. It says such scheduling violates the federal anti-discrimination law Title IX.

Heaven forbid we "diminish the importance of girls sports." Hey, I know how they can make it easier to finish their homework -- don't join the damn basketball team! Of course that would mean bitter disappointment for those of us who have been desperately waiting for more girls sports for so long and have only now begun to appreciate the hard work done by the federal government on our behalf. And girls who don't have the opportunity to compete against each other to the thrill of a dozen or two fans packing the stands will grow up to . . . well, I don't know what they'll grow up to, but I'm sure it will be just awful. So maybe there needs to be another option.

Can we create a category of lawsuit even beyond "frivolous" and punish those bringing them with a few years of incarceration as well as crippling fines?