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Will you. please. turn. that. thing! off?

So this woman in South Carolina stabbed her roommate (and former boyfriend) multiple times because he would not stop playing an album by The Eagles over and over again, and it contains my favorite paragraph of the year so far in a news story:

It's unclear which of the band's songs drove Bader over the edge, but police have narrowed down the possible suspects to "Witchy Woman," "Take It Easy," "Peaceful Easy Feeling," "Take It to the Limit," "One of These Nights," "Tequila Sunrise," and "Hotel California" on repeat.

Come on, people! You went to the trouble of narrowing it down and won't go the extra distance to pinpoint the exact song that got on her last nerve? How about a little investigative reporting? Ask her, for God's sake so we can have some peace of mind.

Personally, my money's on "Witchy Woman"; it just doesn't have quite the same weight as those other songs. From the play list, btw, it was obviously The Eagles' greatest hits album, which is either the best seller of all time, just ahead of Michael Jackson's "Thriller," or else is No. 2 just behind Jackson, or is tied with Jacson, depending on which list you look at -- at any rate, about 29 million albums, which is a hell of a lot of albums. There was a time when I played it so much that I got sick and tired of it and may have stabbed myself if I played it one more time.

Used to do that a lot back in the day, listen to a favorite album over and over again to the point where people around me started to get annoyed. Did it with Jimi Hendrix's "Are You Experienced?" Did it with Neil Young's "After the Gold Rush." Later on, I even did it with Elvis Costello's "My Aim Is True," which is about the point I realized was too old for that kind of stuff, like the night I looked around on Halloween and noticedd I was the tallest kid trick or treating.

Ah, the good times.

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