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Hoosier lore

Bayhfurcated optimist

How do you survive as a not-quite conservative in a conservative state? You try to have it both ways so that you get headlines written about you that say, "Bayh cautiously praises stimulus bill":

"This is not perfect," he said. "I wanted more tax cuts and less spending.

What do you know? Me, too!

. . .he is a little uneasy at the price tag funded by borrowed dollars.

"In the long run, these deficits are damaging ... and they bother me," said Bayh.

Buy the numbers?

When you hear some politician stand up and say that the $787 billion  stimulus bill will "create or save 75,000 jobs in Indiana," are you at least a little bit skeptical? You should be. My ex-editorial page colleague Bob Caylor did a little math and came up with something very curious about estimates of the bill's effects:

The estimates show a curious uniformity, given the widely varying unemployment rates and economic conditions among states and regions within states.

15-13 and a pair of scissors

23-time loser

Indiana lost the world's tallest woman and the world's oldest woman, but, by God, we've still got the world's most married woman:

Wolfe has been married in front of judges and priests, in grand halls and living rooms. The bride wore a white taffeta gown. The bride wore a yellow, two-piece suit. The bride wore denim. She never wrote her own vows. And she always saw the end coming.

Posted in: Hoosier lore

Conning Grammy and Grampy

The scum of the earth can always be counted on to be inventive:

Indiana State Police detectives at the Jasper Post report investigating a new scam that has caused several people to lose money.

Stealth junkets

With congressional committees ostentatiously flaying companies that accept bailouts then take lavish trips, "junkets" suddenly have a very bad name. Business representatives are now deathly afraid that someone, somewhere might think they occasionally have a good time. This is bad news for places like Las Vegas and Hawaii, but, apparently, very good news for Indianapolis:

Table stakes

So, the state allowed its two race tracks to add 2,000 slot machines each, essentially making them casinos as well as tracks, because the owners said they needed the revenue to keep the tracks and horse racing viable in the state. In return, they were supposed to pay $250 million each over two years and pay a graduated tax on revenue from the slots. But now they're in trouble, so let's change the rules:

An alleged post

Sometimes, I think we just fall into newspaperese without thinking about what we're writing:

MUNCIE -- A self-proclaimed white supremacist and Satan worshiper is now also a convicted felon.

Dmitriy V. Sklyarov, 20, of rural Muncie, has pleaded guilty to battery resulting in bodily injury, a Class D felony, filed after he was accused of biting a 9-year-old boy at least 13 times on the arms and legs last Oct. 8.

Hard times

For the "silver lining in the dark recession cloud" file:

VALPARAISO, Ind. - Tough economic times are keeping more families home for home-cooked meals that save money and also bring the family together for the dinner hour, experts say.

[. . .]

Good, bad and worse

I notice that, while the Democrats are busy repairing America's "damaged reputation" around the world because of George W. Bush's mean-spirited "our way or the highway" approach, they can't help but do a little furriner-bashing themselves when it comes to trade. President Obama (correctly) wanted the "Buy American" provision out of the stimulus but is leaving an allegedly watered-down version in.

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