If you're going to put your plane on autopilot, then jump out with a parachute in order to fake your own death:
1. Don't approach a police officer afterward.
2. Don't tell the officer you were in a canoeing accident with some friends.
This would seem like common sense. But Marcus Schrenker is a Hoosier con man apparently unable to believe his careful schemes were unraveling:
The Indiana Supreme Court is letting Gary proceed with its lawsuit against gun manufacturers and distributors for providing guns they knew would end up in criminals' hands, thus encourgaing the "bad things are the fault of anybody with deep pockets" mentality. This is just fine with Paul Helmke:
The Brady Center to Prevent Gun Violence, which represents the city of Gary in the case, called the state high court's decision today a landmark. Attorneys for the gun manufacturers could not immediately be reached for comment tonight.
Badges? City Council members get badges that "are identical to the one that police officers use"? What could possibly go wrong?
Terre Haute City Councilman Ramon "Turk" Roman turned himself in to Terre Haute City Police just after 2 this afternoon.
[. . .]
According to police reports Roman is being charged with impersonating a police officer.
Police tell WTWO Roman was cut off by a driver on Wabash Avenue last month.
Do you realize what danger your neighborhood might be in if people aren't burping their one-potters? If not, you haven't been keeping up with the drug culture and the fascinating ways it keeps adding to the language.
A Marion man takes the idea that religion can make you better off in entirely the wrong direction:
A former church official has been charged with stealing more than $276,000 from church accounts and using some of the money to pay for a vasectomy, motorcycles and cars.
Well, it's a start:
The Indiana Court of Appeals will begin Internet broadcasts of most oral arguments starting this month.
Chief Judge John Baker says the webcasts will give the public another opportunity to learn about the issues before the court.
With all the dreary news out there, I feel compelled to keep you abreast of the humorous, so I try to find titillating tidbits like this one that you mind find uplifting:
Authorities are investigating after more than 300 bras were reported stolen Monday from display drawers at Victoria's Secret in Eastland Mall, according to an Evansville Police Department report.
In all, 320 bras - worth $14,400 or $45 apiece - turned up missing.
I have a new favorite Hoosier public official:
Discussions regarding traffic-watching cameras at stoplights might creep back into the state legislature this year, but two local officials are dubious as to their potential.
Terre Haute Mayor Duke Bennett said he's not surprised the idea is being brought up again as the state begins its Jan. 7 legislative session, noting that he's not in favor of it.
I guess the message here is that if no actual children were in danger of being harmed, the perverts get a break:
"I believe the death penalty is a just punishment for four counts of murder." That's not the police or prosecution calling for the execution of the murderer Joseph Corcoran. That's Joseph Corcoran speaking, being quoted by the appeals court that just put the death penalty back on the table in his case (pdf of the court's decision).
