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Opening Arguments

Gumming up the works

President Obama has been scolded -- again -- for chewing gum at a public event, this time the Republic Day parade in India:

Hot trio

Forget those intricately structured GOP presidential debates that are going to be coming along. Unless they drastically reshape them (which is doubtful), we're not going to get anything more than sound bites out of them. They'll be pretty useless in helpng us to really understand where the candidates stand and what philosophical umbrella they under. Something like this is much more helpful:

Bell, unrung

You can't unring a bell. You can't call back the arrow. What's done is done. Measure twice and cut once. Our language is full of phrases urging great though before we act, because once we've acted there is no turning back.

But, well . . .

Enough!

 

Doom!

Oh, for God's sake:

The Doomsday Clock’s minute hand has been moved two minutes closer to midnight as experts warn we are closer than ever to a global catastrophe.

Free speech? What's that?

Trying times for the First Amendment. Students at the University of Kentucky will be able to choose between very little free speech and even less free speech:

The return of 2nd base

Well, that didn't last long:

Baring her breasts and winking at the camera, ‘Nicole from Bournemouth’ today brought to an end speculation that Page 3 had been killed off.

Dry heaves

I saw a report on CBS this morning about a great surge in the number of Cubans trying to cross the 90-mile strectch of water between the island and the United States and thought, "What the hell?" Isn't a major point of "normalizing" relations with Cuba to cut down on the number of people fleeing that country? Why are we suddenly an even more attractive destination? Naturally I had to turn to the print medium to get the part of the story TV couldn't bother with:

Sex owies

Question of the day -- what's the opposite of safe sex?

It might have emancipated women from the drudgery of the 'Missionary Position', but it seems that men are paying a painful price for revolution in the bedroom.

"Woman on top" is the most dangerous sex position, according to a new scientific study.

A little SOTU nap

Looks like she might be smarter than I give her credit for:

Supreme Court justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg appeared to fall asleep during President Obama's lenghty State of the Union address:

Probably would have happened to me, except that I was watching "Big Bang Theory" reruns instead. More reality there, and it's intentionally funny. Love this Tweet: "We are all Ruth Bader Ginsburg now."

No more 2nd base on Page 2

So, no more "Page 3 Girls," the topless models who have graced Britain's The Sun newspaper for 45 years. Whether this was aimed at appeasing feminist ire was a matter of speculation, but the feminists certainly are rejoicing. However, I found this possible explanation a little more intriguing:

That burger'll kill you

This is the police. Pull over to the side of the road, sir, and -- very slowly -- put down that hamburger:

An Alabama man says he was cited by Cobb County police for “eating while driving” under the distracted driving law.

Madison Turner said he ordered a double quarter pounder with cheese from McDonald’s last week, and a police officer pulled him over, along Canton Road in Marietta.

A radical policy

Why President Obama, following the precedent set by President Bush, can't say "radical Islam" -- because the long war against radical Islamic terrorists requires at least the tacit support of many radical Muslims:

This one's for the gals

Cool off, please

Oh, my God! The sky is falling! Well, first, it's probably going to catch on fire, and then it will fall!

For the third time in a decade, the globe sizzled to the hottest year on record, federal scientists announced Friday.

Gimme

Well, surprise, surprise, surprise. A liberal president proposes to (gasp!) tax the evil rich and pass around the goodies to everybody else. How does the GOP fight a proposal than has things in the middle class would actually like?

Zeroing in on Sniper

There's something I don't understand here:

In spite of the vitriol spewed toward the movie “American Sniper,” Americans flocked to see the Clint Eastwood biopic of the late Navy SEAL Chris Kyle in record numbers.

Smart diplomacy

I did not think it was possible for John Kerry to do anything cheesier than throwing up that hand salute and shouting, "John Kerry reporting for duty" at the Democratic Convention. But, by heavens, I think he's done it:

Under fire for being a no-show at the Paris March Against Terrorism, the Obama administration sent Secretary of State John Kerry to Paris today to give a “big hug” to the French.

Fried

For the "here we go again" file:

The U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) is proposing strict new dietary guidelines for day cares that would prohibit them from frying food that is served to children.

Child care providers would also be formally required to provide children with water upon request, though they would face restrictions on how much apple juice and orange juice they serve.

So's your old lady

Religion of peace shows a nasy streak. No, not Islam this time:

ABOARD THE PAPAL PLANE (AP) — Pope Francis said Thursday there are limits to freedom of speech, especially when it insults or ridicules someone's faith.

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