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Opening Arguments

Don't drink this when you're alone

Today's OMG research into the obvious:

If you drink a Red Bull, then polish off half a handle of Captain Morgan, you're more likely to have casual sex.

That's according to a new study from University at Buffalo's Research Institute on Addictions which took a look at the link between sexual activity, alcohol use and energy drinks (or AmED).

Wimps

Papa Bloomberg

Is there anything Mayor Bloomberg doesn't think should be controlled by the state?

The nanny state is going after moms.

Mayor Bloomberg is pushing hospitals to hide their baby formula behind locked doors so more new mothers will breast-feed.

Sure shot

Nothing hotter than women with guns:

Under a drizzly gray sky, Kim Rhode on Sunday became the first American athlete to win five medals in an individual event in five consecutive Olympic Games.

Altered states

Happy 22nd anniversary to the Americans With Disabilities Act. Bet you didn't know how much that act is needed -- 19 percent of Americans are disabled. Of course, there's disabled, then there's disabled:

A sight to see

Tim Tebow who? Local boy makes good:

It won't go on his personal list of accomplishments, but Peyton Manning helped set another record as the Broncos reported a record 4,372 people came to their Dove Valley headquarters for the team's first practice of training camp.

Blah, blah, blah

Anybody think these are going to be helpful?

The details regarding the highly-anticipated presidential and vice presidential debates of 2012 have been released. There will be four debates this election cycle – 3 of which will be presidential debates and 1 will be a vice presidential debate.

Help, help, my date is boring!

Technology just keeps making our lives better and better. Now, there's a free downloadable Bad Date Rescue app:

This is one for the records

The Indiana gubernatorial race is getting downright ugly, and someone should tell the candidates to cut it out:

Indiana Republicans opened a line of attack on Democratic gubernatorial candidate John Gregg on Tuesday with the argument that he spent too much of the state's money during his time in the General Assembly.

[. . .]

Bible dumper

Today's evidence that End Times are near:

Bibles in nightstands are a familiar amenity for hotel guests, but travelers seeking to read their favorite verse at one establishment will be in for a big surprise.

Protect yourselves

New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg may not have the stupidest gun-control plan ever uttered, but it'll do until the real thing comes along. "Disarm yourselves, or we'll stop protecting and serving you."

Five and counting

Ain't no chicken Muppet, is there?

Today's "news our fathers wouldn't have understood" entry:

If the 40-year relationship of Bert and Ernie wasn't enough to convince you, know that the Muppets are officially supporting gay marriage.

Wankers

Good for Bruce Dickinson:

Iron Maiden's Bruce Dickinson hit out at a fan who spent more time on his mobile phone than watching the band at a recent US gig.

The Quietus reports that a show at the Klipsch Music Center in Indiana, Indianapolis on July 19th was disrupted by the man, who lead singer Dickinson took exception to.

Dead bang

Here's a clear case of unfairness, disenfranchisement of a group of voters that will have a clear disparate impact:

— Several Southwestern Indiana counties are among those that have caught the attention of election watchers for failing to purge their voter rolls of people who have died or left town.

Slow death for Penn State

I still haven't decided what I think about this:

The governing body of U.S. college sports fined Penn State University $60 million and voided its football victories for the past 14 seasons in an unprecedented rebuke for the school's failure to stop coach Jerry Sandusky's sexual abuse of children.

U first, says Ice-T

It's a funny old world when a mere entertainer understands the Constitution better than a supposedly smart leader like the mayor of New York:

Water buffaloed

If you thought bottled water was the biggest scam ever, let's go that one better on the absurdity scale:

“I’ll start with an order of water, move on to some H20, and, to drink, I’d like a glass of your finest vintage water.”

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